Perspective

Flowers or Weeds?

/ Patsy Kuipers / 2 Comments

Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.
1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

What do you see?

When you walk through a garden, are you more likely to see the flowers or the weeds? I’ve come to think of that question as the gardener’s version of seeing a glass as being half-empty or half-full.

On any given day, visitors to my garden can find both lovely sections festooned with flowers and unkempt patches needing my attention. My 5-year-old neighbor, Billy[1], tends to focus on the latter, zeroing in on weeds and, this time of year, unraked leaves. Though I attempt to take my young friend’s comments in stride, they sometimes sting. Try as I might, I can never stay ahead of the weeds.

Recently, Billy’s father overheard him pointing out some things that weren’t to his liking. Seeing a teaching moment, he came over and said, “How do you think it makes Ms. Patsy feel when you say things like that? How would you feel if someone came over to our yard and said the same thing?”

Eyes downcast, Billy replied, “Sad,” then quickly changed the subject.

A Proposal

But, in an effort to help him learn to see the beauty, I made a deal with him – “For every thing you tell me you don’t like about my garden, you need to tell me something you do like. How about that?”

We haven’t been outside at the same time since, so I’m not sure if my proposal will stick. Regardless, as I was reviewing our conversation, the Spirit gently convicted me. “How often do you focus on what’s irritating you or not to your liking, instead of on the blessings and provisions God has poured out on you?”

Ouch! That nudge led me to challenge myself with the same proposal I had given Billy: each time I complain, I need to thank God for a blessing. Could it be that with practice, the complaints will decrease and the praise increase? I hope so! Because ultimately, when I’m grumping about something that’s not to my liking, I’m complaining against God.

Fellow Complainers

It’s so easy to read the account of the Israelites’ wanderings and think, “What’s wrong with these people? They’re always grumbling!”

They’d seen God part the Red Sea, ensuring their deliverance from Pharaoh (Exodus 14:21-29). Yet, it wasn’t long before they were hangry, wishing they were back in the land of their captivity, where they “sat by pots of meat and ate their fill of bread” (Exodus 16:3). God provided manna (Exodus 16), which they tired of and began clamoring for meat. He rained down quail – accompanied by a plague because of their incessant whining (Numbers 11). They demanded water, which God miraculously supplied, not once, but twice (Exodus 17:1-7; Numbers 20:1-11).

Still, they muttered.

Though I’m apt to scoff at the Israelites for their griping, I recognize that I’m equally capable of being discontent. When I focus on circumstances I wish were different or long for things I don’t have, I, too, am dishonoring the Giver of all good gifts (James 1:17), the One who didn’t withhold His only Son (Romans 8:32), and has given me everything I will ever need in Him (Philippians 4:19; 2 Peter 1:3).

Perspective

It remains to be seen whether or not Billy will remember our conversation and his father’s counsel. I, however, have been practicing seeing the flowers instead of the weeds in my daily life, trusting my heavenly Father to remind me of my commitment to do so should I start to lose focus. By the power of the Spirit, I will endeavor to rejoice always, pray without ceasing, and give thanks in all circumstances (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18).

Dear Lord, thank You for the brief encounter with my little neighbor, a reminder that I, too, can fall prey to negativity. You have not withheld any good thing from me. Please help me remember that when I’m tempted to complain.

[1] Name has been changed.

Hugs

/ Patsy Kuipers / 1 Comment

The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit.        
Psalm 34:18

Bedraggled

I’ve lived in Georgia long enough to know gardening can be a challenge as summer draws to a close. This year is no different. I can barely set foot outside without becoming mosquito bait, I’ve had less than half an inch of rain in the past month, and only the most heat-loving of my plants are tolerating the hot, dry conditions. The rest look tired and bedraggled, a reflection of how I’ve been feeling. (See my last post, “What a Friend,” for more on that subject.)

I’ve spent hours moving the sprinkler around the past couple of weeks in hopes of helping my plants survive until it eventually rains. One recent morning, as I went out to turn the water on, my butterfly weed caught my eye.

“Just great. Now something’s been eating my butterfly weed.”

Merry Munchers

Then it dawned on me. “Something’s been eating the butterfly weed!” Sure enough, upon closer inspection, I spied a nearly-grown Monarch butterfly caterpillar methodically munching on one of the few leaves remaining on the plant.

Thrilled, I crossed the driveway to check the butterfly weed planted on the other side. Those plants were almost stripped bare, too, but there were three tiny caterpillars chewing through the tough remains.

My dear friend Susan Hunt refers to such encounters as “heavenly hugs,” those specific touches that remind us that God knows each of His children intimately.

Preoccupied

How could I have missed seeing the caterpillars earlier? I’m usually so observant when I’m in my garden, intentionally searching for treasures that I imagine my heavenly Father placing here and there, then watching with anticipation, waiting for me to find them.

The fact that I hadn’t seen the caterpillars when they first showed up was a clear indication of my gloomy state of mind as I focused instead on the heat, drought, and mosquitoes that were robbing me of the usual joy of being in my garden. Being deprived of that comfort made the other, non-garden concerns even weightier.

Refocus

Seeing the caterpillars reminded me that there had been other treasures in the previous weeks, including a cheerful volunteer sunflower planted by an unknown critter and daily visits from the feisty hummingbird that frequents the black-and-blue salvia near my front door.

A friend, knowing my struggles of the past few weeks, reminded me of the Apostle Paul’s directive in his letter to the Philippians, “Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things” (Philippians 4:8), which followed his mandate, “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4:6-7).

Our focus matters. The attitude of our hearts matters.

Regardless of our circumstances, God has not left us. He invites us to bring our concerns to Him, thankful for the evidence of His love all around us, confident that He will hear us and grant us His peace, peace unlike any the world can give.

Dear Lord, please enlighten the eyes of our hearts so that we may see your good gifts, reminders of Your great love for us, and a mere foretaste of our glorious inheritance in Christ (Ephesians 1:18).

What a Friend

/ Patsy Kuipers / Leave a comment

Search me, O God, and know my heart!
    Try me and know my thoughts!
And see if there be any grievous way in me,
    and lead me in the way everlasting!
Psalm 139:23-24

Muddled

Do you ever find yourself in a muddle, lost for words to even explain to yourself how you’re feeling, much less to be able to convey your disquietude to someone else? Maybe your miserable mindset is the result of one big blow, or maybe it’s the result of a series of smaller disappointments that, when added together, launched you into the abyss.

I’ll admit I’ve been struggling with the latter scenario the past week. When I find myself slogging through a sea of hopelessness, Satan, the father of lies, seizes the opportunity to pile on. Thus, I decided to set aside the topic I had lined up for today’s post and instead turn to Scripture for perspective, creating a lifeline of Truth to climb out of the pit. I pray it will be helpful for any of you who may be floundering in your own slough of despond.

Jesus Knows

We don’t need to verbalize or untangle our emotions before we turn to Jesus. A simple “Help!” is sufficient.  

Even before a word is on my tongue,
    behold, O Lord, you know it altogether.
Psalm 139:4

Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words. And he who searches hearts knows what is the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints according to the will of God.
Romans 8:26-27

Jesus Understands

When the Son took on flesh and dwelt among us, He experienced unimaginable grief, sorrow, and affliction, enabling Him to sympathize with our weaknesses.  

He was despised and rejected by men,
    a man of sorrows and acquainted withgrief;
and as one from whom men hide their faces
    he was despised, and we esteemed him not.
Surely he has borne our griefs
    and carried our sorrows;
yet we esteemed him stricken,
    smitten by God, and afflicted.
Isaiah 53:3-4

For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin.
Hebrews 4:15

Jesus Cares

Jesus has compassion on those who turn to Him for solace. He doesn’t despise our frailties or minimize our sorrows.

You have kept count of my tossings
put my tears in your bottle.
Are they not in your book?
Then my enemies will turn back
in the day when I call.
This I know, that God is for me.
In God, whose word I praise,
in the Lord, whose word I praise,
in God I trust; I shall not be afraid.
What can man do to me?
Psalm 56:8-11

The Lord is near to the brokenhearted
    and saves the crushed in spirit.
Psalm 34:18

He will tend his flock like a shepherd;
he will gather the lambs in his arms;
he will carry them in his bosom,
and gently lead those that are with young.
Isaiah 40:11

Jesus Hears

We never have to worry about Jesus being inattentive or too busy to listen.

The eyes of the Lord are toward the righteous
    and his ears toward their cry.
Psalm 34:15

I love the Lord, because he has heard
    my voice and my pleas for mercy.
Because he inclined his ear to me,
    therefore I will call on him as long as I live.
Psalm 116:1-2

I waited patiently for the Lord;
    he inclined to me and heard my cry.
He drew me up from the pit of destruction,
    out of the miry bog,
and set my feet upon a rock,
    making my steps secure.
Psalm 40:1-2

Jesus Invites Us to Come to Him

Jesus offers us rest for our souls, the rest we desperately need when our thoughts are running amok and we’ve succumbed to Satan’s lies.

Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.
Matthew 11:28-30

Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you.
1 Peter 5:6-7

Jesus Provides

Every need supplied, not just a few or every now and then – that’s what we’re promised in Christ.

And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus.
Philippians 4:19

Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid.
John 14:27

Jesus Guides

As we begin to unravel our emotions and understand what brought us to the low point, we may not know what to do about the situation. How do we have the hard conversations, or ask for forgiveness, or flee Satan? We can turn to God for wisdom:

If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him. But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea that is driven and tossed by the wind.
James 1:5-6

Jesus Delivers

When we’re struggling, the temptation is to turn to the world for comforts of various kinds or to allow ourselves to continue to wallow in our distress. Neither approach honors God nor provides a way out of our misery, but we can trust Him to provide a way out:

No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it.
1 Corinthians 10:13

Jesus Preserves

At times, our thinking can get so off track that we may believe, “I really messed up this time. There’s no way out or back.” That’s a lie, friends! Nothing will ever separate those who are in Christ from God’s love.

Who shall bring any charge against God’s elect? It is God who justifies. Who is to condemn? Christ Jesus is the one who died—more than that, who was raised—who is at the right hand of God, who indeed is interceding for us. Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or danger, or sword? . . . No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.
Romans 8:33-35; 37-39

So, dear reader, if you find yourself in a muddle, barely able to put words to your distressing thoughts, remember that regardless of how you got there, there is One who not only understands you better than you understand yourself, but who is also attentive to your cries and ever ready to welcome, provide, guide, deliver, and preserve to the end.

Precious Jesus, thank You for humbling Yourself by taking on flesh, dwelling among us, living a sinless life, taking the penalty we deserved, and ascending to the right hand of the Father, where You continually intercede for us, so that we might have abundant life now and eternal life in Your presence. Help us to remember that we are never alone.

My grandmother’s favorite hymn, “What A Friend We Have in Jesus,” has been playing off and on in my mind as I’ve been writing. The lyrics beautifully summarize elements of my post:

What a Friend we have in Jesus,
All our sins and griefs to bear!
What a privilege to carry
Ev’rything to God in prayer!
O what peace we often forfeit,
O what needless pain we bear,
All because we do not carry
Ev’rything to God in prayer.

Have we trials and temptations?
Is there trouble anywhere?
We should never be discouraged:
Take it to the Lord in prayer!
Can we find a friend so faithful,
Who will all our sorrows share?
Jesus knows our ev’ry weakness—
Take it to the Lord in prayer!

Are we weak and heavy laden,
Cumbered with a load of care?
Precious Saviour, still our Refuge—
Take it to the Lord in prayer!
Do thy friends despise, forsake thee?
Take it to the Lord in prayer!
In his arms he’ll take and shield thee,
Thou wilt find a solace there.

Words: Joseph Scriven (1820-1866)
Music: Charles D. Converse (1866)

Too Lofty

/ Patsy Kuipers / 1 Comment

For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
    neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord.
For as the heavens are higher than the earth,
    so are my ways higher than your ways
    and my thoughts than your thoughts.
Isaiah 55:8-9

High-altitude Hijinks

My daughter and I got off the plane that brought us from Atlanta and headed to baggage claim in the Albuquerque airport. I usually walk at a brisk pace, a trait that led my daughters to describe it as my “airport walk,” and declare on many occasions as they were growing up, “Mom, slow down! We don’t need to airport walk!”

But on that afternoon in Albuquerque, my body was the one pleading for me to slow down. Heart pounding and breathing labored, my backpack felt more like a rucksack army recruits are required to carry on long hikes instead of the lightweight bag I’d packed when I left home.

Flights don’t usually have that effect on me. What was going on? And then it dawned on me.

“Jessie, do you know the altitude here?”

When my daughter replied that she didn’t, I turned to Google and discovered that Albuquerque, at 5,312’, is the highest metropolitan city in the US, slightly surpassing mile-high Denver.

That discovery led to more googling for symptoms. Elevated heart rate and increased breathing rate were at the top of the list. Relieved to know I hadn’t contracted a fast-acting ailment on the flight, I slowed down. There would be no airport walking for me in the heat and heights that provided the backdrop for our adventures over the following days as we traveled to Flagstaff (6821’), visited the Grand Canyon (7000’), and hiked several trails at Joshua Tree National Park (average 3000’).

I wondered if people who live at elevations above 5000’ adjust. More googling. Why, yes, they do. In addition to the short-term adjustments I experienced, people who make their homes at high altitudes undergo even bigger changes, including increased production of red blood cells, improved oxygen utilization, and increased lung capacity.

Trouble, Trouble Everywhere

By now, you may be wondering where I’m going with all this. My consternation over current events merged with my newfound knowledge of the effects of high altitude, reminding me of the introductory passage above from Isaiah.

Though I limit my consumption of news, even a glance at the headlines informs me of natural disasters, wars, and other calamities. But I don’t have to watch the news to be disquieted or find things to be concerned about. Members of the small congregation at the church I belong to have experienced a variety of challenges this year. Surgeries, deaths of loved ones, the hospitalization of a months-old baby because of seizures, and a young mother diagnosed with cancer – our prayer list grows with each request for supplication.

Like the rarefied air at high elevations stressed my physical body, these events, both near and far, can leave me breathless spiritually and emotionally, wondering, “Why are these things happening to people who love You, Lord? What’s next?”

Slowing Down, Shifting Focus

Just as I had to slow down and up my water intake on our vacation, I need to slow down and drink deeply of God’s word to recalibrate my thinking. Like the lasting changes that occur in the bodies of those who live at higher altitudes, the powerful indwelling Spirit will use scriptures, living and active, to transform my mind, making it easier for me to discern God’s will (Romans 12:2).

Even so, as a finite being, God’s thoughts and ways will always be higher than mine. Thus, I pray to be like David, who declared that he did not occupy himself with things too great for him, but was depending on the Lord, quietly and calmly, acknowledging his limitations and trusting in God’s sovereignty (Psalm 131:1-3).

Dear readers, we, too, can trust the Lord, regardless of what’s going on in our lives or around the world. As we focus on all we know about His character and cling to the assurances found in His promises, knowing He’ll keep every one of them, our anxieties will subside and we’ll breathe easier (Psalm 94:19).

Promises to Ponder

  • God will never leave or forsake us (Deuteronomy 31:8).
  • Jesus is preparing a place for us and will return to take us to be with Him (John 14:2-3).
  • God is making all things new, including us (2 Corinthians 5:17; Revelation 21:5).
  • God works all things together for good for those who love Him (Romans 8:28).
  • God provides sufficient grace in our times of trials (2 Corinthians 12:9).
  • The Lord is close to the brokenhearted (Psalm 34:18).

When things become particularly perplexing, I remind myself this world isn’t all there is:

So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal (2 Corinthians 4:16-18).

Like God Himself, the beauty and perfection of the eternal things are too lofty for us to comprehend!

Dear Lord, there are so many things we don’t understand. You are high and lifted up, yet You also live with those who are humble. Please help us to remember that You are sovereign over all and that You are moving history toward a magnificent conclusion, as You work all things together for our good and Your glory.

Overwhelmed, Christmas 2024

/ Patsy Kuipers / 2 Comments

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in Christ with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places.
Ephesians 1:3

Much like the post I shared two weeks ago featuring Mom’s mottos, I’m considering rerunning this one each year because inevitably, despite my best intentions, there comes a point in the weeks leading up to Christmas when I nearly have a meltdown wondering how I’ll ever get everything done. I lose sight of what we’re celebrating, and the wonder and joy of the season ebb away. When that happens, it’s time to refocus on eternal truths that will remain the same regardless of how many to-dos I cross off my list this holiday season. Knowing some of you might need to refocus, too, I’m reposting this lightly edited version of “Overwhelmed.”

Perspective

What came to your mind when you read the title of this post? Was your initial reaction positive or negative? Usually, when I say I’m overwhelmed, I’ve reached the point of waking up in the middle of the night, wondering how I’ll ever get everything done.

A quick check of Merriam-Webster online yields results that support the negative connotations of the verb:

1: to upset, overthrow

2a: to cover over completely: submerge b: to overcome by superior force or numbers c: to overpower in thought or feeling

However,  inspired by our pastor’s sermon series on Ephesians, I began pondering a more positive take on the word. In Ephesians 1:3-14, the Apostle Paul gushes over God’s blessings in Christ:

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in Christ with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places, even as he chose us in him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and blameless before him. In love he predestined us for adoption to himself as sons through Jesus Christ, according to the purpose of his will, to the praise of his glorious grace, with which he has blessed us in the Beloved. In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses, according to the riches of his grace, which he lavished upon us, in all wisdom and insight making known to us the mystery of his will, according to his purpose, which he set forth in Christ as a plan for the fullness of time, to unite all things in him, things in heaven and things on earth.

In him we have obtained an inheritance, having been predestined according to the purpose of him who works all things according to the counsel of his will, so that we who were the first to hope in Christ might be to the praise of his glory. In him you also, when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation, and believed in him, were sealed with the promised Holy Spirit, who is the guarantee of our inheritance until we acquire possession of it, to the praise of his glory.

I’ve read that passage many times, but the idea of Paul gushing over God’s goodness was new to me. Yet that’s precisely what he’s doing! I imagine him exalting God, nearly breathless, as he recounts all our blessings in Jesus. Our pastor encouraged us to do likewise and allow ourselves to be overwhelmed by God’s goodness toward us.

The Holiday Hustle

As the holiday season ramps up, so does my sense of overwhelmedness. When I contemplate adding cherished holiday traditions to my already bulging to-do list, restless nights are sure to follow. But each year, the message from Ephesians and our pastor’s frequent invitation to embrace and embody our identity in Christ have encouraged me to approach the season differently. Rather than letting my to-do list have the final say, I pray I’ll be overwhelmed instead by all the blessings that are ours because God chose to send us the best gift ever – His only begotten Son.

A Positive Practice

Several days after I originally wrote this article, my 90-year-old father had a stroke. I’d been preparing to do battle with my usual holiday stresses when a barrage of new responsibilities hit. In those early days of trying to ensure I procured the proper care for Dad and managing day-to-day logistics once he returned home, I was tempted to ignore the holidays altogether. Over and over again, I thought, “I feel so overwhelmed.” And each time I did, the words I’d written came back to me, and I reminded myself of all the blessings that are mine in Christ.

After several weeks of this practice, the sequence became instinctive. I would sense the stress starting to build, sometimes multiple times a day. “How will I ever handle this?” ran through my mind, quickly followed by, “I feel so overwhelmed!” The once-negative word triggered the new, positive response, shifting my focus to the realities greater than my circumstances, realities that are valid year-round and forever: I have all I’ll ever need in Christ, plus the promise He’ll never leave or forsake me:

He has said, “I will never [under any circumstances] desert you [nor give you up nor leave you without support, nor will I in any degree leave you helpless], nor will I forsake or let you down or relax My hold on you [assuredly not]!” (Hebrews 13:5, Amplified)

An Invitation

Will you join me? Pick one or more of Paul’s affirmations to meditate on the next time you feel weighed down by cares or responsibilities: In Christ, we are blessed, chosen, blameless, adopted into God’s family, redeemed, forgiven, sealed with the Holy Spirit, destined to receive the inheritance held secure for us in heaven. Just reading this makes my heart sing!

Take another look at the last definition above, “to overpower in thought or feeling.” When the truth of Who God is and all He’s done for us in Christ overpowers our worries, fears, and anxieties, it is a most blessed conquest indeed.

Dear Lord, as we shift our gaze from the immediate to the eternal, I pray our thoughts and feelings will be overwhelmed in the most positive way by Your amazing grace and all You’ve blessed us with in Christ, to the praise of Your glory.

Overwhelmed (Revisited)

/ Patsy Kuipers / 2 Comments

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in Christ with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places.
Ephesians 1:3

This post is based on an article I wrote for the November/December 2021 edition of our church’s women’s ministry newsletter. I remembered it several nights ago as I was lying awake in the wee hours thinking about all the Christmas-related things I hoped to get done. I decided it was time to revisit what I’d written, to refocus on eternal truths that will remain the same regardless of what I accomplish this holiday season. I thought some of you might need to be reminded, too, so I hope you’ll enjoy this recounting.

Perspective

What came to your mind when you read the title of this post? Was your initial reaction positive or negative? Usually, when I say I’m overwhelmed, I’ve reached the point of waking up in the middle of the night, wondering how I’ll ever get everything done.

A quick check of Merriam-Webster online  yields results that support the negative connotations of the verb:

1: to upset, overthrow

2a: to cover over completely: submerge b: to overcome by superior force or numbers c: to overpower in thought or feeling

However,  inspired by our pastor’s sermon series on Ephesians, I’ve recently been pondering a more positive take on the word. In Ephesians 1:3-14, the Apostle Paul gushes over God’s blessings in Christ:

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in Christ with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places, even as he chose us in him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and blameless before him. In love he predestined us for adoption to himself as sons through Jesus Christ, according to the purpose of his will, to the praise of his glorious grace, with which he has blessed us in the Beloved. In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses, according to the riches of his grace, which he lavished upon us, in all wisdom and insight making known to us the mystery of his will, according to his purpose, which he set forth in Christ as a plan for the fullness of time, to unite all things in him, things in heaven and things on earth.

In him we have obtained an inheritance, having been predestined according to the purpose of him who works all things according to the counsel of his will, so that we who were the first to hope in Christ might be to the praise of his glory. In him you also, when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation, and believed in him, were sealed with the promised Holy Spirit, who is the guarantee of our inheritance until we acquire possession of it, to the praise of his glory.

I’ve read that passage many times, but the idea of Paul gushing over God’s goodness is new to me. Yet that’s precisely what he’s doing! I imagine him exalting God, nearly breathless, as he recounts all our blessings in Jesus. Pastor David has encouraged us to do likewise and allow ourselves to be overwhelmed by God’s goodness toward us.

The Holiday Hustle

As the holiday season ramps up, so does my sense of overwhelmedness. When I contemplate adding cherished holiday traditions to my already bulging to-do list, restless nights are sure to follow. But this year, heartened by Pastor David’s invitation to embrace and embody our identity in Christ, I hope to approach the season differently. Rather than letting my to-do list have the final say, I pray I’ll be overwhelmed instead by all the blessings that are ours because God chose to send us the best gift ever – His only begotten Son.

A Positive Practice

Several days after I submitted the newsletter article, my 90-year-old father had a stroke. I’d been preparing to do battle with my usual holiday stresses when a barrage of new responsibilities hit. In those early days of trying to ensure I procured the proper care for Dad and managing day-to-day logistics once he returned home, I was tempted to ignore the holidays altogether. Over and over again, I thought, “I feel so overwhelmed.” And each time I did, the words I’d written came back to me, and I reminded myself of all the blessings that are mine in Christ.

After several weeks of this practice, the sequence has become instinctive. I sense the stress starting to build, sometimes multiple times a day. “How will I ever handle this?” runs through my mind, quickly followed by, “I feel so overwhelmed!” The once-negative word triggers the new, positive response, shifting my focus to the realities greater than my circumstances. I have all I’ll ever need in Christ, plus the promise He’ll never leave or forsake me:

He has said, “I will never [under any circumstances] desert you [nor give you up nor leave you without support, nor will I in any degree leave you helpless], nor will I forsake or let you down or relax My hold on you [assuredly not]!” (Hebrews 13:5, Amplified)

An Invitation

Will you join me? Pick one or more of Paul’s affirmations to meditate on the next time you feel weighed down by cares or responsibilities: In Christ, we are blessed, chosen, blameless, adopted into God’s family, redeemed, forgiven, sealed with the Holy Spirit, destined to receive the inheritance held secure for us in heaven. Just reading this makes my heart sing!

Take another look at the last definition above, “to overpower in thought or feeling.” When the truth of Who God is and all He’s done for us in Christ overpowers our worries, fears, and anxieties, it is a most blessed conquest indeed.

Dear Lord, as we shift our gaze from the immediate to the eternal, I pray our thoughts and feelings will be overwhelmed in the most positive way by Your amazing grace and all You’ve blessed us with in Christ, to the praise of Your glory.

A Grandmother’s Heart

/ Patsy Kuipers / Leave a comment

Children’s children are a crown to the aged, and parents are the pride of their children.
Proverbs 17:6

Mama Bear

Many years ago, an article I read described being a mother as having a piece of your heart walk around in another person. When your child hurts, you hurt. When they rejoice, you rejoice with them. Weeping with those who weep and rejoicing with those who rejoice is scriptural (Rom. 12:15), but those feelings are magnified when the one doing the weeping or rejoicing is your child.

I wasn’t an overprotective parent. As my daughters grew up, I allowed them to work out their challenges to the extent it was appropriate for their ages and maturity levels. Even so, they knew I was there to back them up, and when issues arose that were beyond their abilities, I stepped in to advocate for them.

I’d like to say I always did so with grace, but there were times when anger or frustration got the best of me. Though this may not be the best example, it’s the one that came to mind immediately as I typed that line. One morning, I was following behind newly licensed Mary, who was driving to school with her younger sister Jessie in the passenger seat. Someone cut between us and started tailgating Mary. Unable to give the driver an ample piece of my mind regarding road etiquette, I did the next best thing – I gave her a long, loud blast of my horn. Not my proudest mom moment, but my “cubs” were threatened, and it was the only way I could intervene.

Grandmama Bear

Fast forward nearly 20 years. In addition to my beloved daughters, I now have pieces of my heart residing in a dear son-in-law and three precious grandchildren. Grandmama bear is real, friends! From the early days of strolling grandson Joshua through the neighborhood and wondering how I’d fight off an unfamiliar dog who was eyeing us with a menacing glare to now, messing with my kids or grandkids is likely to raise my hackles.

Such was the case recently. Though it would be inappropriate for me to share details of the challenges we’re currently facing, suffice it to say it’s as if someone threw a grenade into our family. Misunderstandings, accusations, and ultimatums splattered everywhere. And now we’re left to pick up the pieces and find a way forward.

My heart aches for my children and grandchildren.

Reaction or Restraint?

The first few days after hearing the news, my emotions ran hot. Anger, sorrow, bewilderment – back and forth, up and down, my feelings tumbled and churned. Grandmama bear wanted to confront those who’d wreaked havoc, demand an explanation, and describe the painful aftermath of their actions.

But in the two decades since the horn-blowing incident, my spirit has become quieter and gentler because of the influence of the Spirit that dwells within me. So instead of lashing out, I took my jumbled emotions to the One who hears it all and bears it all. After several days of crying out to the Lord, He reminded me that nothing comes to us before it passes through His hand. It wasn’t “those people” who’d inflicted the situation on us. No, our loving heavenly Father had allowed it for His purposes.

 A Firm Foundation

Spewing hateful words and blaring our horns at people may make us feel better in the moment, but Scripture tells us it is fools who give full vent to their anger (Prov. 29:11). Such behavior merely multiplies the harm (Prov. 15:1). As a senior member of my family who yearns to sow seeds that will yield sweet, lasting fruit for generations to come, my actions need to point them to Jesus. Thus,

  • I can pray for my family without ceasing and in all circumstances (1 Thess. 5:17; Phil. 4:6-7). When a horde comes against us, and the way ahead is unclear as it is now, I can pray as Jehoshaphat did, “Lord, we don’t know what to do, but our eyes are fixed on you” (2 Chron. 2:12).
  • I can be diligent in sharing my love of God with my grandchildren, weaving His word into our conversations as we sit at the table eating lunch, when we stroll the sidewalks of their neighborhood looking at plants and critters, and when we say bedtime prayers on sleepover nights (Deut. 6:7).
  • I can recite countless examples of God’s goodness to our family, reminding them that God has never forsaken us and never will. Those stories are part of my grandchildren’s heritage of faith, no less than God’s people hearkening back to their deliverance from Egypt (Ps. 78:1-4).
  • As one who has endured the sanctifying fires of loss and hardship, I can testify that God’s promises are a sure anchor for our souls and that His word is a firm foundation on which to build our lives. When the winds of adversity blow through our days, they won’t topple us (Matt. 7:24-25).

As much as this (grand)mama bear would like to protect her offspring and shelter them from all harm, I know that my faith has grown most through the times when I came to the end of myself and clung to God for help. I can say with Elisabeth Elliott, “The deepest things that I have learned in my own life have come from the deepest suffering. And out of the deepest waters and the hottest fires have come the deepest things that I know about God.”[1]

I would not wish a stunted faith for my children and grandchildren. Therefore, I will entrust them to the One who loves them perfectly and eternally, knowing that He will work every hurt and heartache for good (Rom. 8:28). I will watch and pray and continue to grow right along with them.

[1] Elisabeth Elliot, Suffering is Never for Nothing (Nashville, B&H Publishing Group, 2019), p. 9

Choosing Sides

/ Patsy Kuipers / 6 Comments

“Now therefore fear the Lord and serve him in sincerity and in faithfulness. Put away the gods that your fathers served beyond the River and in Egypt, and serve the Lord. And if it is evil in your eyes to serve the Lord, choose this day whom you will serve, whether the gods your fathers served in the region beyond the River, or the gods of the Amorites in whose land you dwell. But as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.”
Joshua 24:14-15

Co-conspirators

Several years ago, I was seated at my daughter’s kitchen table. 5-year-old Lyla had barely finished saying the blessing over our PBJs and Goldfish when 8-year-old Joshua started whispering to 3-year-old Emma. I caught enough of his words to figure out the gist of what he was saying.

“Are you plotting against Lyla?” I asked.

“Hey! You’re not supposed to be listening!”

“It’s kind of hard not to overhear. I know I’m getting old, but my ears still work!”

Joshua scowled while Emma flashed an innocent “who me?” expression my way.

Usually, my grandchildren play well together. Everyone has a role in their imaginative scenarios, from setting up a petting zoo to running a bakery to fighting pretend foes. But sometimes, two will team up against the third, with Emma often being the one left out. No wonder she reveled at the turn of events.

Their behavior reminds me of my own childhood. I had several playmates on the street where I grew up. We’d go through cycles of acceptance and shunning, declaring life-long allegiance one day and then descending into angry silence over some perceived slight the next.

And don’t get me started on the agonies of middle school. Long before online bullying reared its ugly head, slam books were the epitome of teen-girl meanness.

Only Two Sides

Sometimes when two grandchildren are excluding the third, I ask them if they think their unkind behavior is pleasing God. One or both will cast their eyes downward and reply, “No, Grammie.”

“And if you’re not pleasing Him, who are you pleasing?”

I usually provide the answer, though they’ve become more astute regarding sin and evil and loving God (and parents) by being obedient (John 14:15).

Just like being a life-giver or life-taker are opposite sides of the same coin, pleasing God or pleasing Satan is like a spiritual toggle switch.[1] Satan is the father of lies, who came to steal, kill, and destroy (John 8:44). Masquerading as an angel of light, he is the purveyor of darkness and deceit. God is Light. In Him, there is no darkness (1 John 1:5). He only speaks the truth, and He is abounding in steadfast love.

God told Joshua the people would have to choose who they’d follow and whether or not they’d obey. Joshua boldly stated, “As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.” The people immediately pledged the same, but they couldn’t keep their vow, and neither can we.

Foreign Gods

You may read the introductory passage above and think, “I don’t worship idols.” I agree that it would be unlikely to find an altar with little carved images in the home of a professing Christian. However, when we consider an idol as anything that takes God’s rightful place in our hearts, we must admit our hearts are fickle, constantly putting other things above Him in our affections.

Even good things, like family and friends, can usurp God’s place. Sadly, I find Self and my desires and preferences seated on the throne of my heart far more frequently than I like to admit.

Unity in Christ

I wish I could say we outgrow our tendency to elevate ourselves by diminishing others by the time we reach adulthood. Instead, we often revert to an us-vs-them mentality when disagreements arise, forming coalitions and choosing sides. We seek the approval of men, longing to be included and accepted. In our striving to be right, we can become self-righteous, forgetting that we would stand condemned apart from God’s saving grace.

But this type of behavior among God’s children doesn’t bring Him glory.

On the night Judas betrayed Him, Jesus prayed for all His disciples, those with Him then and those who would believe based on their words. That includes us! And what did He pray? That we would know the love and unity enjoyed by the Trinity (John 17:20-26).

Even now, Jesus is seated at the right hand of God, interceding for us (Romans 8:34)!

Choosing Wisely

Praise God that not only does Jesus pray for us but also that the Holy Spirit indwells us with the same power that raised Jesus from the dead, giving us a new will to obey and enabling us to do so (Ephesians 1:19-20; Philippians 2:13).

Thus, when we’re tempted to take sides or give in to our own desires or think, “Surely this small trespass won’t count,” we need to remember there are only two sides – darkness and Light. As children of God, Scripture calls us to walk in the light as He is in the light (Ephesians 5:8-9). We’re to let our light so shine before a watching world that they, too, will want to join us in the Light of His love.

Dear Lord, how blessed we are to be called Your children. Thank You for bringing us out of darkness into Your marvelous light. Please help us to remember there are only two sides in the spiritual battle. May we choose to walk in the light, enabled by the Spirit, out of love and gratitude for all You’ve done for us.

[1] Please see the tab, “Give Life,” for more on life-giving and life-taking behaviors.

Look Up!

/ Patsy Kuipers / 4 Comments

I lift up my eyes to the hills. From where does my help come? My help comes from the Lord, who made heaven and earth.
Psalm 121:1-2

The Long-lost Rug

This time 50 years ago, my parents and I were living in Argentina. Dad was working for a subsidiary of his US employer, and Mom and I were along for the 2-year adventure. We made use of school holidays to travel around Argentina and to other Latin American countries. And, as most tourists are wont to do, we accumulated plenty of souvenirs. One of our favorites was a llama-skin rug that depicted a woman tending one of the furry pack animals.

Mom and Dad used it as a wall-hanging when we returned to the States, and then at some point, my husband and I took possession of it. The rug hung on our wall for a while, but there was no place for it when we moved from Delaware to Georgia, so we returned it to my parents.

Then somehow, it disappeared.

Occasionally the rug would come up in conversation, and we’d muse, “Whatever happened to it?” Some good-natured banter would follow the question:

“I think you have it.”

“No, I’m pretty sure I gave it back to you.”

“Well, wherever it is, we haven’t seen it for years!”

So it went until one day last month when I was searching for something in my late mother’s closet. I looked up, and there it was, neatly folded on the top shelf! I’m not sure why Mom tucked it away in there with her clothes, but I felt like I’d found a long-lost treasure and couldn’t wait to tell my family about the discovery.

The Dark Hole is Real

I don’t know about you, but it seems like at least once a week, I or someone else in my family will bemoan the fact we’ve misplaced something. Sometimes we’ll find the missing item in relatively short order. Then again, there are times when objects remain lost for weeks, months, or even years, like the llama rug. We refer to this as “the dark hole syndrome,” as in “the dark hole ate it.”

A few days after locating the rug, I began helping my dad prepare to move into assisted living. His new apartment has a small porch that is still big enough to accommodate two of his deck chairs. I offered to get some cushions to make the metal seats more comfortable. Dad replied that he already had some, and we proceeded to hunt for them.

We searched in all the logical places – in the basement where he kept the patio set, in the garage, in the storage area tucked under the stairs – all to no avail.

“Chalk up another one for the dark hole,” Dad sighed.

I’ve made almost-daily trips between Dad’s house and his apartment, picking up necessities as well as niceties he forgot to include in the initial transport of stuff. I was standing in his closet, talking to him on the phone as he gave me instructions about where to find that day’s requested item. I looked up and started laughing.

“Guess what I just found!”

“What?”

“The chair cushions!!”

“Where?!”

“On the top shelf in your closet! I need to start looking up more instead of straight ahead all the time.”

A Spiritual Parallel

The words had barely left my mouth when a spiritual application occurred to me. Too often, when faced with a challenging situation, I focus on the dilemma in front of me. Instead of taking a Biblical perspective, I become mired in the what-ifs and oh-nos. The dark hole of doubt swallows up what I know to be true about God as surely as my family’s fictional dark hole occasionally devours objects.

But when I look up, I remember I’m not alone. My help comes from the Lord, the very Maker of heaven and earth (Psalm121:1-2).

Furthermore, the Spirit gently reminds me of the truth found in the Apostle Paul’s second letter to the Corinthians:

So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal (2 Corinthians 4:16-18).

The things pressing in on me will soon pass, whereas those currently hidden or out of focus will become clear and constant (1 Corinthians 13:12). God’s promises and assurances are always there, ready to be seen by enlightened eyes of faith if we’ll simply look up.

Dear Lord, please enlighten the eyes of our hearts that we may know the hope you’ve called us to, the glorious riches of our inheritance in Christ, and the immeasurable greatness of Your power toward us who believe (Ephesians 1:18-19).

Age-old Assurances for a New Year

/ Patsy Kuipers / Leave a comment

But this I call to mind, and therefore I have hope: The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. “The Lord is my portion,” says my soul, “therefore I will hope in him.”
Lamentations 3:21-24

Downcast

It’s a rainy afternoon in Georgia, and my mood matches the scene outside my window. For as long as I can remember, I’ve used the last few days of December to reflect on the year just past and plan for the one ahead. But a week of isolation due to a positive Covid test may have given me too much time for my yearend ruminations.

Recent celebrations hammered home the resounding headline for 2021: Mom’s gone. The New Year won’t change that or bring her back.

And, already looming on the horizon, more significant changes for our family, the details and what-ifs of which are disconcerting. Plus, there will no doubt be challenges currently known only to God.

Fighting for Joy

As you may have gleaned from my last couple of posts, though, I’ve been valiantly fighting for joy throughout this first holiday season without Mom by counseling my heart with truth. This post is no different, so I’ll let Scripture do the talking for a while:

  • Deuteronomy 31:8: “It is the Lord who goes before you. He will be with you; he will not leave you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed.”
  • John 16:33: “I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.”
  • Romans 8:28: And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.
  • 2 Corinthians 4:17: This light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison.
  • James 1:2-4: Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.

Proven O’er and O’er

Scripture is the inspired word of God and to be trusted regardless of our feelings or circumstances; however, one of the things I like best about growing older is I have more and more real-life examples of God’s faithfulness and trustworthiness to recall. As the lyrics to ‘Tis So Sweet to Trust in Jesus say, “Jesus, Jesus, how I trust Him! How I’ve proved Him o’er and o’er! Jesus, Jesus, precious Jesus! O for grace to trust Him more!”[1]

There will be challenges this year, but the Lord has never left or forsaken me, and He never will. In fact, He uses the hard things to draw me closer to Him, to grow my faith, and to comfort and encourage me so that I might comfort and encourage others with the same comfort and encouragement I’ve received (2 Corinthians 1:3-4).

And, just as there are unknown difficulties ahead, there will be joy and blessing beyond what I can ask or imagine because God does work all things together for good for His beloved children.

Encourage One Another

I don’t know how you’re feeling today, dear reader. Maybe you’re entering the new year buoyed by fun family gatherings, having enjoyed all your favorite foods and traditions. Then again, you may be like me, fighting for joy, having engaged in those traditions without a loved one, and facing more changes in the near future.  

Regardless of our circumstances, we can take heart in knowing we belong to the One who never changes (Hebrews 13:8). Our loving Heavenly Father is always working out His purposes according to His good and perfect plans and will see them through to completion, when Jesus returns to set all things right. Therefore, let us encourage our own hearts and one another with all we know to be true as we await His promised return.

Dear Lord, thank You that we can come to You with our joys and sorrows, our hopes and fears, knowing that You are a compassionate Father who remembers we are dust. Your mercies are new every morning, and your grace is sufficient for each day. Thank You that we’ll never face life alone because You are with us, now and forever.

P.S. Since I started this post some three hours ago, the rain has stopped, and the sun has peeked out a time or two, providing the amen to my thoughts.

[1] Louisa M. R. Stead