I will hope continually
    and will praise you yet more and more.
My mouth will tell of your righteous acts,
    of your deeds of salvation all the day,
    for their number is past my knowledge.
Psalm 71:14-15

Secrets?

A longtime friend texted me after she read my last post to tell me she’d suffered an injury almost identical to one of the ones I described. It happened years ago, as did mine, but I never knew of our common experience until now. Admittedly, decades have passed since we lived near each other, and talking about such minor injuries isn’t at the top of our conversation topics when we schedule phone dates. But the fact that I didn’t know got me thinking about more serious things we intentionally hide, even sometimes from those closest to us.

I’m not implying that this particular friend has deep, dark secrets she’s never told me despite our five decades of friendship. No, I’m thinking about how reticent I’ve been to share things from my past for fear of rejection or condemnation. Yet, when situations arose that made it fitting to do so, I’ve not only been freed from my self-imposed isolation, but I’ve also made it safer for others to share their hard things. There is wonder and relief in knowing, “I’m not the only one!”

When someone further down the road assures us that God can redeem our brokenness and bring beauty from ashes (Isaiah 61:3), relief and hope unite as the Light leads us out of darkness.

Credentials

My dear friend Sharon Betters refers to the hard things the Lord brings us through as our credentials. As we call back to others, our experiences make us credible witnesses of God’s steadfast love, goodness, and faithfulness.

On a recent episode of her Daily Treasure podcast[1], Sharon included a quote from Oswald Chambers, which contained the following:

“There is no such thing as a private life . . . for a man or woman who is brought into fellowship with Jesus Christ’s sufferings . . . We are not sanctified for ourselves, we are called into the fellowhip of the Gospel, and things happen which have nothing to do with us . . . Why shouldn’t we go through heartbreaks? Through those doorways God is opening up ways of fellowship with His Son . . . If through a broken heart God can bring His purposes to pass in the world, then thank Him for breaking your heart.”[2]

Thank Him for breaking your heart? That’s unthinkable apart from our eternal security in Christ (2 Corinthians 16-18) and believing that God is working all things together for the good of those who love Him, those called according to His purpose (Romans 8:28). We can find great comfort in knowing that our little stories are part of God’s great big story. He’s weaving the plot lines together in ways we may not understand in the moment or possibly not even this side of Heaven, but we can always trust His character.

For the Lord will not
    cast off forever,
but, though he cause grief, he will have compassion
    according to the abundance of his steadfast love;
for he does not afflict from his heart
    or grieve the children of men.
(Lamentations 3:31-33)

Propriety

There are appropriate times and places to share how the Lord has brought us through challenging circumstances. Not all the stories He’s entrusted to us are meant to be broadcast from a public platform. Some are best processed with wise counselors and trusted friends. Even so, we need to be willing to share when God sovereignly places someone in our lives who would benefit from hearing how He’s worked in and through even our darkest places.

There are some things I’ll probably never write a blog post about. However, I pray for discernment to know when God has ordained a crossing of paths and is nudging me to bless someone with the assurance others have passed on to me: you are not alone, and God can redeem even this.

Before I close, I also want to remind us to be slow to judge since we don’t know all the experiences that have gone into making a person who they are, much less how far along they are on their journey of restoration (1 Samuel 16:7; John 7:24). I’ve had several instances when a piece or two of information has completely changed my perspective on someone’s behavior. And I’ve had others make similar comments when they’ve learned more about my past.  

There are still tender spots in my soul, scars that will cause me to retreat in situations that evoke painful, long-ago events, but I trust God will use even those lingering scars for His good purposes.

So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal (2 Corinthians 4:16-18).

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[1] “A Private Life?,” Daily Treasure, August 31, 2024. Daily Treasure is one of many resources available through MARKINC Ministries.

[2] Oswald Chambers, My Utmost for His Highest, November 1 devotion: “Ye Are Not Your Own.” (Grand Rapids, Discovery House.)